i feel
when i was in elementary school, my 4th grade class had a class hamster. we named him george. i often used him to gauge my moods. when i was happy and excited and ready to take on the world, i felt sorry for him. george was cooped up in a cage all day long without any aspirations or goals. he had the same boring routine everyday. the same faces looking in at him through his cage. he was doomed to a meaningless life, and someday, a meaningless death.
but when i was miserable and lonely and felt like nothing would be okay ever again, i felt jealous of him. george had such a simple life. i wished it was me that got to eat food out of a tiny little bowl and drink water from a straw that was just my height at set times everyday. i wished it were me that only had to worry about whether or not i wanted to take a nap or take a spin on my wheel. no commitments, no disappointments.
george the class hamster died a peaceful death towards the beginning of my 5th grade year. however, i still think about him sometimes. if i really gotten a choice to either be a bold, brave human or a quiet, weak hamster, which one would i choose? and which one would my 10 year old self choose?